Born Into a Belonging Bootcamp: What Systems Taught Me About Starting With Self

I often describe my entry into the world as being born into a "Belonging Bootcamp".

In many ways, my birth parents were part of an early Equity, Diversity, Inclusion and Belonging (EDIB) initiative of the 1960s. They met through an intercultural high school exchange program. After four years together, I was born.

Immediately after my birth, my mother was forbidden to breastfeed me. When she tried anyway, a nurse tore me from her arms. I was placed directly into foster care.

When we reunited more than 25 years later, she told me she had been bullied by social workers and misled about my adoption. My adoptive parents were also misinformed, delaying adoption and prolonging neglect and trauma.

From the very beginning, my experience of belonging was shaped by attitudes, behaviours, values, and practices embedded in systems that claimed to be acting in my best interest. Recognizing these patterns and actively engaging in the Belonging Matters Framework is essential for meaningful people and culture change and for advancing Equity, Diversity, Inclusion and Belonging (EDIB) within organizations and communities.

Seeing the patterns: Attitudes, behaviours, values, and practices

Over time, I began to see a pattern. Exclusion is rarely the result of one decision. It is produced through:

Attitudes that normalize harm as “professional judgment”
Behaviours that prioritize compliance over care
Values that elevate efficiency over dignity
Practices that silence lived and living experience in the name of neutrality

These dynamics show up in workplaces, schools, and community initiatives. The Belonging Matters Framework helps organizations recognize these patterns and provides robust programs and guidance to implement people and culture change that fosters inclusion, trust, and belonging.

Celebrating Success Event for Belonging Matters: Peer-Led Initiatives to Address Overdose Crisis (Richmond, BC)

The risk of skipping the inner work

When we try to change systems without examining the attitudes, behaviours, values, and practices we ourselves carry, we risk burnout, disconnection, and eroding trust. Even well-intentioned initiatives can unintentionally reproduce the very exclusions they seek to address.

Systems don’t exclude people on their own. People do—often unintentionally—through patterns they’ve never been supported to notice or transform.

Belonging begins with you

Lasting people and culture change begins within—not as an act of self-improvement, but as a practice of responsibility. When individuals experience belonging internally, they show up differently. When that inner shift is paired with skillful design, guidance, shared accountability, and exquisite strategy, systems can change too.

This is the work of the Belonging Matters Framework: much like a modern Belonging Bootcamp, it guides people and systems through an inside-out process that makes exclusion visible, restores dignity and voice, and builds cultures of trust where belonging can take root and endure. Through this framework, organizations can achieve sustainable people and culture change while advancing Equity, Diversity, Inclusion and Belonging (EDIB) in tangible, measurable ways.

Belonging Begins With Me (program highlight)

For leaders and teams ready to experience this transformation firsthand, our Belonging Begins With Me program is a 1.5-hour experiential journey that provides practical outcomes and takeaway tools. Participants engage with both personal and system-level practices to immediately apply learnings and foster cultures of trust and inclusion.

Next steps…

Ready to explore how the Belonging Matters Framework and the Belonging Begins With Me program can support your organization?

Hop on a call with me today to discuss how we can help your team or community move from patterns of exclusion to lasting belonging.

Schedule Your Call

Tags:

Belonging, Diversity, EDIB, Equity, Inclusion, people and culture change

About the Author:

Jessie Sutherland

An international speaker, trainer, and consultant, Jessie Sutherland works with organizations and communities to engage diversity, build belonging and ignite intercultural collaboration. Her approach creates sustainable community change that effectively addresses a wide range of complex social problems.

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